Wednesday, June 20, 2012

Costume Party for Words (Part2)

I know the most exciting day of my life is tomorrow and it is pretty much all I've been working on for months and months, but I decided to write about something else today. I wanted a mental break from thinking about rehearsal for the party and then the organization and setting up for the party tomorrow. So I thought I'd use today's blog to just have fun again.

So I give you some more word peculiarities or thoughts about words by me:

Template- good way to get fired (who cares you'll have a different job next week)

Heroes- while she sits in the front and complains about the uncomfortable boat seat

reverse - i.e. "I'm Henry the VIII I am " song style

Chopin - cookware for display only

Glockenshpeil - Samuel L Jackson's character's "Ezekiel 25:17" speech in Pulp Fiction

Doctorate- how the country pharmacist knew what the prescription was ("I caint read what the doctorate down")

Butterfly- not very far

Hindsight- what I have at the beach

Afterbirth- when lots of stuff happens

Aftermath- for me? Music

Airbrush - hard to paint with

Bedridden - no comment

Bellhop- very easy to do (few exceptions i.e.-the Liberty Bell)

Carhop-more difficult

Hopscotch- why would you do that when you could just as easily drink it?

Brickbat- pretty sure that's not MLB regulation

Briefcase- what lawyers hope for

Broadcaster - very antiquated non PC term for a woman angler

Buttermilk - schizophrenic dairy product

Grasshopper- what I am every time I hop (provided I'm out in the yard)

Championship- winner of the regatta

Checkmate- what a wife does when the husband gets back from guy's night out. (usually for lipstick marks or drunkenness and lipstick marks)

Cheesecloth- Come on people....why are we not making tablecloths out of this stuff. (note: probably the worst material to consider for a picnic blanket. The ants. Dear God. The ants)

Clockwork- ummm looks a lot like standing in one place and flailing arms around in circles. Yeah that should be called clock play. Good try, clocks!

Cobweb- Corny version of the Internet (where this blog post gets drastically more traffic than here on the regular Internet)

Cornstalk- what happens on chat rooms on the cobweb

Copycat- fun to watch but not PeTA approved

Counterattack- what I am deathly afraid of and why I don't go into the kitchen alone.

Counterintelligence- there is no such thing. It just brutishly and mindlessly sits in the kitchen ready to attack. (for no good reason)

Cowhide- not very well. Usually they just stand in plain view and slowly eat grass

Crabgrass- what the crustaceans smoke to get high

Crackdown- good news for drug enforcement agencies.

Crapshoot- I don't recommend. Very messy

Crosstalk - "why hath thou forsaken me"

Crybaby- baby

Deadbeat- disgusting thing to do. Also if a horse is the victim's very pointless

Deathbed- bad place for a nap

Downfall- due to gravity this is the only way it works.

Dumbwaiter- don't get me started. I said "No Mayo!"

Dustpan- used to cook powdered eggs

Earmuff- there are some kinky people in this world

Eggplant - I did. Didn't grow the first thing.

Eyesight - cant we just call this "sight"? I'm pretty sure at this point we have ruled out earsight, nosesight, etc as possibilities.

Eyewitness- witness

Foolproof- liquor so strong only an idiot would drink it

Forefathers- dang! your mother gets around

Foregone - the reason she is now a single mom.

Fretwork- don't we all

Hailstone- why the Druids built Stonehenge

Halfback- good rebate

Halfbreed- impossible. It's all or nothing.

Handbill- fortune teller receipt

Heretofore- have 6

Homemaker- construction foreman (makes me have seriously respect for All "Little Susie Homemakers" out there. What with the Sheetrock and scaffolding and all. And to be so dainty)

horseback riding- Can't we just say horse riding? Was anyone really planning on riding the horse's leg or head?

Horseflies- Pegasus

Houseflies- Wizard of Oz

Housekeeper- what they needed in Wizard of Oz

Housewarming party- turn on the heater . Let's drink!

Inkwell- good penmanship

Inpatient- catheters, IVs, suppositories and such

Jackpot- a drug theft

Kidnap- Ahhh I used to love those. About 1 in the afternoon after we had eaten lunch. Glorious! I wouldn't mind one now actually.

Knapsack- Hey! Find another pillow

Lawsuit- pretty much just a suit

Longfellow- thanks for noticing

Manhandle- no comment

1 comment:

  1. I have so enjoyed reading your blogs! I am so excited for the release party later today and I know you are excited beyond words. I must say that, while I loved reading about the meanings behind each song on the solo album, my favorite blogs have been the Costume Party for Words! It is brilliant how you have played with them and I can't wait for more!!